Moments in our Month: AUGUST 2013

CIRCULATION OF ANY OF THESE PHOTOS IN HERE IS STRICTLY PROHIBITED

Reach me through theaquinolazaro@gmail.com

The month began positively.

It was last month when Ora asked to Oscar to buy her a smurf toy, 

and so we headed to McDonalds to buy her what she wanted, 

when we arrived home and I showed her the toy still sealed in a plastic,

she recognized it right away. 

“Thank you Papa Ca.” Were all she had spoken.

There were series of good lessons with Ora at night and she’s responding positively. 

I bought her books to help in tutoring her. 

Came good news, in academics, 

Ora ranked first at school during her last exam recently.

Each day she’s learning different things and also without missing a day 

she’s losing gazillion of hair clips and pony tails and crayons at school 

and still she hates writing.

The following week my heart cries quietly. 

My kids have been in pain for days now. 

I can bear my own pain, but theirs weakens me. 

We had a short travel to Oscar’s hometown; 

we stayed for only about 4 hours which was truly not the plan. 

We wanted to stay much longer yet we needed to take Ora back home for she rapidly felt bad. 

We thought she was fine already after 2 days of fever.

On our way to the hospital I hold her while feeling so weak with constant coughing. 

My girl was diagnosed of having pneumonia.

But she’s remained my brave little one.

The nurse needed to take a blood sample with her but instead of crying, she chanted a song and with her every pace, pause and sigh I heard…

“Love of Jesus sweet and marvelous, love of Jesus… Ahray!!!! … sweet and marvelous … ohhhh… ohhh…

and along with her lines I heard the nurse sang…

After days of not being at pre-school,

her teacher paid her a visit at home to check Ora’s condition. 

For the first time, we let her used nebulizer to aid her in her breathing. 

On some occasions she complained about the pain in her tummy every time she coughs. 

I would often hear her say “Mama Da, masakit ang belly-belly.”  

More than this, it is still so amazing to see that I still look at her with such love and beauty despite of the weakness her body endures.

 On the same circumstance, 

Quad, after few days got terribly sick and every one at home were terribly fretful. 

His temperature never touched normal. 

Once in a while he feels frail then back to being spirited. 

On some nights he would cough terrible cough and made some constant cries.  

With my body covering him at night and with his small hand holding mine, 

my heart trembles every time he cries for pain.  

But my voice and touch holds more power than it ever has. 

The sound is calming him and to him my hands, always a spring of ease. 

And he’s back to sleep again. 

It’s just so heartbreaking every time I leave home to work during the day seeing him so pathetic, 

with his eyes communicating to mine, 

that he needed me having him that awful feeling.

 On some nights, 

I stay up late with late dinner retelling stories to Oscar and stories in the news web. 

Then he would ask if I ate my lunch. 

Then I would try to deviate to another story.

One rainy ,humid afternoon, my uncle, 

who suffers from diabetes came and stayed for days at home. 

I talked life and death with Oscar, 

I told him I’d rather suffer from asthma when I die rather than be eaten alive with my own flesh and people around me complains about the foul awful smell. Lol.

On a lighter side… in random topics, 

Quad in which his hair is getting so long makes us want to go to a kids barber shop and let him have a new hairstyle. 

Then in the mornings before Oscar and I would leave the kids,

Quad would specially have a short while carry and he would just lie to his papa’s shoulder and when being put down , 

he would cry and in an instant, 

we would see an awful little boy begging and wanting to be held.

Once in a while, I feel the overshadowing pull of commitments and engagements that I must attend to and I feel trapped. 

So I wasn’t able to come to Ora’s dance presentation. 

I fail to see the moment where she was given flattering remarks by Mayor Duterte in his speech for a solo dance performance. Lol! 

Well, that’s for the reason that the show should apparently be carried out by 13 kids, 

but on the day of performance, 

I was told that she, was the only one who did the full performance in the entire presentation. 

Where hundreds of audience gathered around the venue intrigued by who will be performing with its loud music, possessing you, completely taking over your body and force you to dance, 

only to find out that there was only one little girl dancing while the other kids ended up as her back ups.

Yes! I am truly lucky for me having these wonderful creations.
Perhaps, this verse somehow, speaks beautifully to what I am feeling now… 
Garth Brooks’ song, “Unanswered Prayers", he sings:  

Sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers
Remember when you’re talkin’ to the man upstairs
That just because he doesn’t answer doesn’t mean he don’t care
Some of God’s greatest gifts are unanswered prayers.

Now and again I pause and wonder when I call them my babies, 

if they really still are.  

I remembered when my decision to have children early may be an unaccepted one, 

but for me it makes all the sense in the world.

It makes me wish that people would see us for our thoughts and actions, 

not how many days we’ve been alive.

Today, I would I sit down and I would gather my thoughts and I will look back 8 years ago, the year I met the man that I never thought would be my forever.

B, I know that, no matter what, we'll stay together, through thick and thin. That's what real love and commitment is all about, and that's what I have for you. I was remembering our courtship and how we would look into each other's eyes and talk about growing old together. Of course, we had no idea what that meant, but we knew we had our whole lives before us. Now, we’re here, not old yet! Eight years later, still in love, still happy,still looking toward the horizon wanting to walk the journey of life together.

Thank you for loving me back and being my beautiful and great companion for the last eight years. When I feel that things are bigger than me, you are always there, holding my hand, showing me that together we can handle anything in our path. Thank you for remaining infinitely patient in me. I am indeed a work in progress. 

Thank you for encouraging me and pushing me further than I think I can possibly go. Thank you for acknowledging that being a mother and wife is just a part of who I am and for encouraging me to be Adang, the struggling writer, the teacher, the woman, the individual. Thank you for Quad and Ora, our sweet super one and megamind, that I didn’t realize I even wanted. 

Thank you for investing in our partnership every single day. Whether it’s preparing me my coffee in the morning, though sometimes I would leave it without a sip or  calling me before you head home. 

And we've had fun, haven't we? Remember when Ora was young and we were so broke. We went downtown with Ora and all we could offer her is just a small five peso cone of an ice cream. Somehow, we’re still blessed, now we could buy her gelato atleast!Just a cone nga lang… Lol!

We shared so much, both good times and hard times, but we've faced everything together.

Eight years ago, I had no idea that I would be with someone that would become more and more lovely as time passed. We have been through so much together, I know we can weather the years ahead.

So, B, isteyput lang! Kaon sa ta! 

;)

Enjoy the current season of your life!

Thank you for dropping by!